And Let There Be Light
Hey ladies, hope all of you had a wonderful Mother's Day!!!! Got a question……have any of you been in a funk lately, a dark place, feeling stuck, gloomy, no energy, feeling down, just don’t care, not feeling Pharrell’s HAPPY!!!! Well, you are not alone, it appears to be at an epidemic level. I too have been feeling this way. I’m a take it back to “1978”, I use to go to clubs, you know you heard one club is better than the other, club hopping. I came out feeling happy, overjoyed, and energetic. My problems were still there but it allowed me a minute to release the tension and forget. Well today because I’m wiser, stronger, and so much better(u got it, Marvin Sapp), I go to Church to get my edification. I found myself Church hopping, not wanting to leave or didn’t want the preacher to stop preaching because it appeared that every sermon was orchestrated just for me!!!!! As I was driving home one evening from Church, I kept saying to Jesus, what is it, why do I feel as I do, I know You hear my prayers, am I not praying enough, do You need a break from me, I stop complaining, I even say thanks to my trials, I fasted, laughed at the devil, stomped the devil, rebuked the devil, what are You saying to me, please make it clear, how long must I be tested, my faith is growing dim, my zeal is almost gone, I smile (thanks Kirk Franklin)when I really want to cry but I’m tired of crying because it messes up my eyes and my make up. LOL. One day I was talking with my brother and he said I’ve been where you are and I know how you feel devalued, unworthy, and selfless, people look at you funny, or treat you differently or maybe it’s you imagining all of this. But hold on because God is positioning you for greater. See I was full of myself, meaning I thought within 6 months I was due to retire early(lump sum incentive packet) and I had all these plans. I was working on overdrive, already depleted, and can’t wait to get out, can’t take it anymore. Watching a company merge can be devastating, and change can bring undue stress. I was like a yoyo, praying you to keep your job but telling God that you can’t take it anymore….oxymoron. Let me just say, watch what you pray for. Downsize happened and I was let go. I say all of this to say, I realize sometimes Jesus wants our attention, sometimes with Him, trust Him, lean on Him, and let Him order our steps because He knows what’s best. Almost like an athlete, He had to pull me out of the game and ride the bench.
I realize something, since I have Surrendered All ( Old hymn, you are good) not asking God for anything JUST PRAYING/PRAISING, just being thankful and fasting not because someone suggested it but because I need that spiritual connection along with my faith walk. All that time I wasted feeling sorry for myself, angry because most of my emails read…..overqualified, or accepted but you have to travel to Fairfax, Beltsville, Rockville, Whoville(Dr. Seus),,,, I have learned a valuable lesson…Let your light shine!!!!! It took a metaphor for me to get it….as I open my blinds in my office, there’s a pool directly across and the sun rays reflect on the water causing glare on my screen. While trying to look at my screen, I must have been squinting because my boss came in and ask,” why don’t you close your blinds, doesn’t that light bother your eyes?” As I looked up at my boss to reply, looked back at my computer there was a beam from the water from the sun piercing into my window that reflected on MY COMPUTER!!!! As I began to tear up….I replied..” No, LET THERE BE LIGHT”!!!!!!! You see as long as I kept my eyes on my problems, my priority was seeking permanent employment, I made that more important than Jesus, I kept my focus on a job not praying or talking or meditating on Jesus, His Words, His Blessings. Each time someone got Bless, family or friend, I’m in the background yelling,” I GOT NEXT”. My head was down because I felt down, but Jesus allowed me to work a temp job, making less money, that just had a WINDOW just for me to see my future is brighter!! The SON….the SON…. THE SON. You see I took my focus off of my job situation because I saw Jesus in all His beauty and all He was saying was, Tami, it’s not about you, your employment, I am your Jehovah Jireh, I have provided for you, and your family. You thought you had to continue to work 50-plus hours, I sat you down to rest, and replenish your health, soul, and emotions, but you start your prayer with, thank you for the job that’s on its way, you run to each Church jumping every alter call line for someone to pray with you for you and or over you for a job!!!!! You can’t rest because you are restless, you wake up and go to sleep with this very thing weighing heavily on you because you make it your priority!!!!!! Take your focus off of it and focus on Jesus, no barter!!! Jesus wants to see If my work is aligned with my faith, my work is not to worry, no wavering mind, trust Him, His blood HE shed, we could never repay Him and He is the SON…and the sun that I get in my window helps me to reflect how priceless it is to open the window and allow and receive all the opportunities that are waiting to attract to me. I get now the what and the why my grandmother used to shout about….” This Lil light of mine”(another old hymn) I almost missed by Blessing because of holding my big head down. LOOK UP TO THE HILL…that’s where your help comes from, find your window, open your door, let the sunshine in, let your sunshine when you are lonely, need a friend, down to your last dime, hopeless, jobless, keep your vision, don’t miss your Blessing cluttered by doubt, darkness and gloom! Be HAPPY!!!! LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE!!!!! Song for the day….THIS LITTLE LIGHT ON MINE….I’M GOING TO LET IT SHINE!!!!
Genesis 1 vs 1
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